Killing Was Never a Crime (a story)

First of all: Let me note that I am open to suggestions, critique, and you could even tell me if you want to be in the story. Basically, just tell me what you think. Also, this is the prologue, so it's short. Don't mind that, haha.

"P-please! Don't touch me!" she screamed, her eyes darting around the room in terror; searching for some sort of salvation.

Shouts of bloodthirsty laughter filled the air; smoke reaching to the roof with an air of drunkenness about it. The figure at the foot of the table smiled a little, then glanced at the female Feca at the corner of the room. He waved his hand nonchalantly, and a pair of young Sacriers stood up from the wooden table. They walked over to the Feca calmly; their hushed voices filling the silence.

"We had never agreed to this, Golmir!" One whispered, their heads ducked towards each other.

"It's either her or us, Tolbart." The other responded, looking at the girl. Small tears glistened on her cheeks; the lush rosy color in her cheeks had drained.

"Are we to really stoop to his level?" Tolbart said uncertainly. His brows had furrowed in fear and angst. "We may be many things, but we are not killers." He said the word quickly, hurriedly.

"Or are we? Think about it. What choice do we have in the matter?"

"We could kill her, or we could run away." Tolbart replied, his hands perspiring heavily.

Golmir seemed to contemplate the matter, then watched Tolbart carefully for a matter of moments.

"Hurry up, will you?" The man at the foot of the table declared; his voice as heavy as thunder. Golmir nodded, then unsheathed his dagger from his belt. Tolbart cringed and prepared to look away as Golmir lifted the weapon. Ten seconds passed, and just as Tolbart looked towards the girl, Golmir struck. But no, not at her. He struck at the ropes tying her to an old chair, and she came free.

"Run, Tolbart!" He bellowed, just as two men ran towards them. Tolbart sprinted towards the exit, not looking back. His heart pounded in his chest, and his eyes were bulging with anticipation. Tolbart didn't dare to slow down, not for a second. He only dared to look back once he was safely out of the borders of Brakmar to see if anyone was chasing him.

Nobody. So Golmir had not escaped. He was free, and he was alone.

Yay!

It looks like a good story :3

Maybe change the first sentance...
If it was me screaming, out of terror, my eyes would be darting around the room, searching for a way out, a sympathetic eye, a potential weapon. I would be doing everything but staring at the ground.

On the other hand, if I had giving up and was staring at the ground, I would not be screaming anymore. I would be mumbling and begging, or maybe just silent.


Other than that, its excellent I can't wait to read the rest :3

Oh. I hadn't thought of that, but thanks. I'm going to edit it, haha.

Sorry, I'm a bit weird with things that don't make a proper picture in my mind =s

That works better :3